It is New Year’s Eve and I thought I would take a minute to let everyone know how I am doing after my most recent hospitalization. I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he wants me to be out on disability for another month while the increase in medication takes effect. This was devastating news as I really want to get back to the working world. I miss my clients and wonder how they are doing. But I must heed my doctor’s recommendations to take a month off work and not even think about it. I am a very high functioning person with SA so it is hard when one is told to stop and see a therapist twice a week and even join an outpatient program for at least the next month. I also saw my new therapist today and she has assigned me quite a bit of homework. In addition to seeing her twice a week (I am glad I feel comfortable with her), I have to keep a daily mood journal and make sure to exercise to beat this depression that is often encompassing my soul. After leaving the doctorate program I began to lose hope that I have a special purpose in this life but my hope is being instilled slowly that I can continue at my current job in February and do what I love, work with children and their families. There is just so much to this disorder, if I am not psychotic I am depressed and vice versa. I do think the depression is worse than being psychotic but I don’t wish either on anyone. The best part of my journey is that I have an awesome support team which includeds my amazing daughter, other family and some good friends along with my therapist who I feel I can shared almost everything. So I will practice what I preach and aim for peace to return while I do my assignments and trust the healing process.
Happy New Year to all my readers, old and new! Here is to a better 2015 one filled with hope, happiness and life!