Seeing my psychiatrist was very therapeutic and helpful. I shared everything with him and he did not fail me. I am so glad I have a psychiatrist I can trust…
He listened closely and allowed me to tell my story of the last few weeks and gave me a lot to think about. I like that he is an hour away so I can think about his suggestions on the drive home.
Basically, he said that my temporary psychosis was probably caused by me quitting smoking suddenly. Now that I am not having thought insertion anymore it makes me think twice before picking up another cig. It’s been 12 days since I have smoked anything and I am much happier clean and sober and not smoking!
I am getting out more, not isolating nearly as much although I still do enjoy my alone time. My house is tidier than ever although I need to clean my kitchen floor more regularly. Yesterday I cleaned my drawers and computer area and it feels great to have things in order. I am also getting to my AA meetings and listening to tapes of AA speakers to help me stay sane. I haven’t been in recovery for a while.
My doctor also said that I shouldn’t work until after my disability hearing so that is off the table for the next few months. I will think about working again after the hearing at a low stress job.
My mood is low tonight. A lot has happened today and I suffered much today because of my disorder. I suffer every day but today I realized something that is too close to home to share about on here. Here is to better days to come.